THE MARS CHRONICLES
Behold the previous guest writers brilliant entries. Did they really work alone or were UFOs involved? We'll never know...

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Ian baber - 07-Feb-00 10:37 PM
What would be the worst form of torture for you? listening to david soul LP's
Is purple a fruit? most definately
What would you do if your cooking caused an acid rain that threatened to kill the entire population of your country? cook some more
What would you do if you found a parallel universe under your bed? get a new wife, as she does not clean the house well enough
What do you expect to hear from the Mars Polar Lander's microphone? masterbating gold fish
At times, I have a sudden urge to eat some purples


Kiki Carter - 07-Feb-00 06:12 PM
My URL: none
My Email: kiki69_69_99@hotmail.com
What would be the worst form of torture for you? fire
Is purple a fruit? no
What would you do if your cooking caused an acid rain that threatened to kill the entire population of your country? laugh then hide in a top secret hideout!!! So no one would kill me!!!
What would you do if you found a parallel universe under your bed? i would visit it and become the queen!!!
What do you expect to hear from the Mars Polar Lander's microphone? A marsion singing dancing in the rain!!!

Comments:
funny thanx for the cool site!!! Its intresting. thanx again. Bye!!! asl? Kiki


matt the cactuar slayer - 02-Feb-00 04:27 AM
My URL: http://www.angelfire.com/ga2/mattsartpage
My Email: mattrix12@aol.com
What would be the worst form of torture for you? freak me out badly
Is purple a fruit? eh....depends on who you are
What would you do if your cooking caused an acid rain that threatened to kill the entire population of your country? run
What would you do if you found a parallel universe under your bed? hop in! my life is boring enough as it is
What do you expect to hear from the Mars Polar Lander's microphone? an alien go "i think someones recording us!"
At times, I have a sudden urge to spasm and laugh uncontrollably

Comments:
hello funny funny page hello okay this is enough ramblings ok cya buh-bye ok ok ok hot dog hot dog ok cya mesa go now goodbye all ok ok ok goodbye have happy fun time.


Goth - 15-Jan-00 01:43 PM
My Email: stupid104@hotmail.com
What would be the worst form of torture for you? Living with Elvis ( I'd starve to death).
Is purple a fruit? of course! What else do you think it is??? It has a special flavor to it which only comes to you after you eat earwax.
What would you do if your cooking caused an acid rain that threatened to kill the entire population of your country? I would move into an asylum and stay there safely with Barney, the Tellitubbies and Papa Smurf.
What would you do if you found a parallel universe under your bed? I'd throw John Howard into there and rule Australia,
What do you expect to hear from the Mars Polar Lander's microphone? "Do you want fries with that???"
At times, I have a sudden urge to sit in a corner and think about toilet duck and solvo drain cleaner.

Comments:
I am the little nothing that finds a corner and sits in it.


jay - 09-Jan-00 10:02 PM
My Email: hih@kmart.com
What would be the worst form of torture for you? this life
Is purple a fruit? uhhh is it a vegetable?
What would you do if your cooking caused an acid rain that threatened to kill the entire population of your country? that would be cool
What would you do if you found a parallel universe under your bed? id like bring a bomb and blow it up
What do you expect to hear from the Mars Polar Lander's microphone? "Uh Mars sucks dont go here you will explode!"
At times, I have a sudden urge to Destroy little countrys. and eat

Comments:
this site sux


Joe Brabender - 08-Jan-00 04:12 AM
My Email: brabendr@wctc.net
What would be the worst form of torture for you? sssllllooowww loading pictures on web pages
Is purple a fruit? blondes occasionally wear purple..so I guess...Yes
What would you do if your cooking caused an acid rain that threatened to kill the entire population of your country? Consult Julia Child (..hic)
What would you do if you found a parallel universe under your bed? Suspect that I fell asleep during a "Sliders" marathon
What do you expect to hear from the Mars Polar Lander's microphone? "Car 54, WHERE are you??"
At times, I have a sudden urge to become a deranged postal worker

Comments:
You really need to change the way your graphics load. Not all of us have ISDN, T1 (etc.) Invite us to help with your parody images. Spec format, resolution and size. Display 72 download high if you want.


batman - 04-Jan-00 03:00 AM
What would be the worst form of torture for you? torture
Is purple a fruit? yes
What would you do if your cooking caused an acid rain that threatened to kill the entire population of your country? ask them to eat some
What would you do if you found a parallel universe under your bed? clean my room
What do you expect to hear from the Mars Polar Lander's microphone? nothing
At times, I have a sudden urge to break things when I get ticked off.


blue - 29-Dec-99 01:10 PM
My Email: bluegirl235@hotmail.com
What would be the worst form of torture for you? stuck in a lift with a sweaty old man, and tony blair (or the same person?)
Is purple a fruit? yes, orange is after all
What would you do if your cooking caused an acid rain that threatened to kill the entire population of your country? happens every time i turn on the oven- so i would just let it rain!
What would you do if you found a parallel universe under your bed? Been there, done that
What do you expect to hear from the Mars Polar Lander's microphone? i would rather not think about that
At times, I have a sudden urge to Fall in love and go to this website

Comments:
Great website for mad people! Very interesting, and very funny entries.


elives - 22-Dec-99 03:55 PM
What would be the worst form of torture for you? Hillary as president
Is purple a fruit? only if there is no fuzz growing on it
What would you do if your cooking caused an acid rain that threatened to kill the entire population of your country? It did and I'm not allowed to cook ever again
What would you do if you found a parallel universe under your bed? I belive ther is one forming. I read from dust life started so it look like it going to be A very large life form
What do you expect to hear from the Mars Polar Lander's microphone? Stop sending all your outdated equipment here
At times, I have a sudden urge to answer things like this

Comments:
I'm sane but I don't know about every one else


G.Goblinson - 10-Dec-99 10:40 PM
What would be the worst form of torture for you? Math questions involving numbers higher than 12 while being forced to listen to American Pop and Country music. Hey this has happened already 17 years ago in school, no wonder why I keep having those nightmares.
Is purple a fruit? It's a flavour, not a fruit and it tastes really good on bread.
What would you do if your cooking caused an acid rain that threatened to kill the entire population of your country? Take the whole entire country hostage with empty threats of opening a restaurant.
What would you do if you found a parallel universe under your bed? Get a small group of specially trained (and governmently paid) research scientiests to help me explore the dangers falling out of bed.
What do you expect to hear from the Mars Polar Lander's microphone? The laughter of the many children secretly relocated to Mars by NASA.
At times, I have a sudden urge to question my life from the other side of a parallel universe.

Comments:
Help me someone! The "Polar Lander" is in my back garden and is taking photos of my bathroom through the window!


Fred Flitstone - 10-Dec-99 09:57 PM
What would be the worst form of torture for you? watching old Charlie Chaplain movies
Is purple a fruit? yes
What would you do if your cooking caused an acid rain that threatened to kill the entire population of your country? eat it
What would you do if you found a parallel universe under your bed? explore it
What do you expect to hear from the Mars Polar Lander's microphone? swearing from the martian that it hit on the head
At times, I have a sudden urge to scream at the computer

Comments:
Funny book.


Tanus - 09-Dec-99 01:16 AM
Email:tanusathome@hotmail.com
What would be the worst form of torture for you? Genitalia wired to the national Electricity supply
Is purple a fruit? If it has seeds its a fruit..hang on..what about Tomatoes...and er .well...Bollocks..to put it politely
What would you do if your cooking caused an acid rain that threatened to kill the entire population of your country? Move
What would you do if you found a parallel universe under your bed? This happened to me after taking magic mushrooms....seriously
What do you expect to hear from the Mars Polar Lander's microphone? CRUNCH.....If they ever get a result
At times, I have a sudden urge to Seek help...but it soon passes

Comments:
Love this site...


The Editor - 07-Dec-99 02:12 PM
My URL: http://marstraveller.tripod.com
What would be the worst form of torture for you? To be stranded on a desert island with Kenny G and his tool of Satan.
Is purple a fruit? Indeed!
What would you do if your cooking caused an acid rain that threatened to kill the entire population of your country? I would recycle the cookbook and buy an acid proof umbrella.
What would you do if you found a parallel universe under your bed? I would call the National Enquirer and my therapist.
What do you expect to hear from the Mars Polar Lander's microphone? "Are You Lonesome Tonight?"
At times, I have a sudden urge to sneeze on strangers in lifts/elevators.

Comments:
My utter lack of a social life has resulted in this first entry.


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