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> Marie Fredriksson - Nyhetsmorgon Lördag <
TV4 Nyhetsmorgon Lördag 9 February 2008. Translated by Mikael.
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In September 2002, one of Sweden's greatest pop artists, Marie Fredriksson, fell after she had been out running. Doctors discovered that she had a brain tumour. Since then she has gradually struggled to get back to a normal life, among other things with the help of her drawings. In 2005 she had her first exhibition, and now she is back with another one. Lasse Bengtsson went home to Marie's house, in the middle of her creativity.
"Ett Bord I Solen" is played.
Lasse Bengtsson: Compared to the previous exhibition which was black and white, you have used a lot of colours this time. How come?
Marie Fredriksson: I got tired of it - it turned out to be so dark. Grey and dark. But the strange thing is that for this exhibition I have used a lot of colours, but now I feel that I want to go back again to using only charcoal. So I'm discussing it with myself, trying to make my mind up. What should I use today? Charcoal. No, I have to have colours. Another day it could just be colours. It depends largely on how you feel. It's a cool thing, just look at this blue part here and then look at the grey area. I feel that they belong together, but on the other hand they don't. I can't really explain it, but I can feel freedom and silence. Freedom, tranquility and silence. Those words make me comfortable I think.
LB: Do you have to have that around you when you create?
MF: Yes, very often. But sometimes I can feel that I have to listen to some rock 'n roll, since it's been too quite too long here. Then I play music really loud. It depends on how you feel.
MF: I can only start if I feel like it. Does it feel good today? Then I start drawing and a lot of things just happen. Or nothing comes out of it, and I get mad and throw the papers away. Expensive papers, but I have to throw them away. I can't stand to look at them when they have failed. So when I'm in a good mood and have a lot of self confidence, then I can do anything. It's the same thing when I play and sing. It's all about what you have inside, right now.
LB: What different dimensions does drawing have compared to making music?
MF: This is freedom, total freedom.
LB: More than music?
MF: Yes, because I've been singing and playing music all my life. I know how to do that. It was a big sorrow for me when I got ill, since I couldn't do anything. I didn't feel like singing or playing, nothing. That was hard. But then when I recovered, and started feeling good, I began to write songs again and sing. Singing most of all. That was a kick, to come back again. But then again, since I have been singing so much, it is drawing that has taken more and more space. And it has made me feel so good. Even though the illness was hell, it has given me a totally different attitude towards life. I live one day at a time. Actually, I'm so grateful that it has turned out the way it did. It was a really close call, I could just as well not have been sitting here now. I have friends who have had the same thing and who are no longer alive. Those things really make you think. I'm so grateful to just be alive. But it's over and I shouldn't keep on talking about it.
LB: But how are you now, Marie?
MF: I feel so good now.
LB: Is it improving?
MF: Oh yes. The only medication I take now is for epilepsy. I have to take that. But the difference is so big, you have no idea. To be able to wake up in the morning and feel happy and awake, and to be able to get up. There was a time when I couldn't do any of that. I can even go outside, I was out walking in the woods yesterday. The nature is really beautiful out here in Djursholm. Just to get that fresh air, I love being here. Right now the weather isn't that great, but still.
LB: Has it affected your creativity in any way. What about your eye-sight?
MF: (Points at her right eye) It's gone, it will never return. My left eye is the healthy one. When I look at you...hold on... I have to move my head, because I'm totally blind from here. (Draws a line to the right of her nose). It's really difficult, I keep hitting stuff, because I can't see. But I've become used to it.
MF: This is a good one actually (starts drawing lips on her drawing).
LB: These faces, who are they?
MF: Some of them I know well, others are just from my imagination. I can't tell you which ones are real. (laughs).
LB: But they are living people?
MF: Oh yes, some of them.
LB: How much of it is you then?
MF: This one for example, is called "Me". It shows my three faces. I look really terrible, especially in this one (points at the middle one). That's what I looked like when I was feeling the worst.
LB: What do you see in that picture when you look at it now? What was it like?
MF: Horrifying. I was so swollen from all the cortisone. I had to take so much cortisone. But I still thought I wanted to have that picture, as it is a part of me. It took me a long time to decide to show it, but then I thought - this is what it was like.
LB: If we have a look at some of the other paintings...
MF: This one was made in '06.
LB: "Blue wind".
MF: Yes, that was a hard time actually. It's been two years, almost three since this one. But I had started to use crayons and experiment with colours. It was a kind of hope, but it was a damned hard time.
LB: What was the hard thing about that period?
MF: I was still recovering. The illness has kept me in a vice all the time until last summer, when the doctors told me that I was fully recovered. That was enough - just to hear that made me a new person.
MF: Let's see here. Yes this is my favourite.
LB: "Punk".
MF: Yes.
LB: What does punk mean to you?
MF: Liberation, a wonderful liberation. And the music - fantastic music. "God save the Queen" was a wonderful song.
LB: This one means something special I suppose (points at another drawing).
MF: It's called "Ett bord i solen" (A table in the sun). That's one of the best things I know, to be able to sit down at a table in the sun. It means so much I think. It makes you feel so good inside, especially in the spring.
MF: (Reads from a book) A table in the sun. To me it means light. That's where I'm most comfortable, in the light. Warm or cold, it doesn't matter. The light is most important.
LB: Everyone is of course wondering about Per Gessle and Roxette. Do you have any plans like that?
MF: Oh yes. Of course. We're discussing it all the time. It will happen eventually, but we don't know when and how.
LB: But you really mean that, that it's realistic that you will do something again as Roxette?
MF: Yes, I think so.
LB: Can you cope with that, touring and so on?
MF: I don't think I'm going to jump around like I used to. I was crazy back then, running across the big stages we used to have. It doesn't have to be the same again, it could be something smaller maybe. We'll see.
LB: When you think about the future, what do you think? You say you don't like to think ahead, but rather live for the day.
MF: Yes, that way of thinking makes me feel comfortable. Next week I have to do this or that. Right now we are here and I really appreciate that. We have had a great afternoon here, the sun was shining, fantastic. I really enjoy things like that. You don't know what will happen tomorrow. Maybe it will snow. (laughs)
LB: Have you become better at enjoying life?
MF: Oh yes, I have to. I'm forced to. Well forced maybe isn't the word. But I'm so grateful for what happens, for every day I wake up and feel healthy. That's the best thing in life.
Marie Fredriksson. Her exhibition at the So gallery in Stockholm will continue until next weekend.
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