Chapter 1 - In
pricipio creavit Deus caelum et terram
About Creativity, the Universe and similar eternal
crap
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Chapter 2 - formavit igitur Dominus
Deus hominem de limo terrae et inspiravit i faciem eius spiraculum vitae
et factus est homo in animam viventem
Woman is a song; sung by an insane masochist!
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Chapter 3 - et dixit Dominus Deus ad
milierem quare hoc fecisti quae respondit serpens decepit me et comedi
Human beings are not stupid. They just don't understand
anything.
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Chapter 4 - dixitque Cain ad Abel fratrem
suum egrediamur foras comque essent in agro consurrexit Cain adversus Abel
fratrem suum et interfecit eum
Mankind could be devided in merely twain cathegories;
gay pissdrinkers and swine.
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Chapter 5 - masculum et feminam creavit
eos et benedixit illis et vocavit nomen eorum Adam in die qua creati sunt
The vikings weren't only killers and plunderers.
They were also rapists.
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Chapter 6 - delebo inquit hominem quem
creavi a facie terrae av homine usque ad animantia a reptili usque ad volucres
caeli paenitet enim me fecisse eos
May I become your zingo cavalier?
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Chapter 7 - adhuc enim et post dies
septem ego pluam super terram quadraginta diebus et quadraginta nicitbus
et delebo omnem substatiam quam feci de superficie terrae
Livet är en strid - ström
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Chapter 8 - at illa venit ad eum ad
vesperam portans ramum olivae virentibus foliis in ore suo intellexit ergo
Noe quod cessassent aquae super terram
Jag
har alltid öppet deklarerat mitt stånd och min punkt, dvs min
ståndpunkt!
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Chapter 9 - bibensque vinum inebriatus
est et nudatus in tabernaculo suo
I've got nothing to say - and I'm gonna say it loud!
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Chapter 10 - hae generationes filiorum
Noe Sem Ham Iafeth natique sunt eis filii post diluvium
1983 I became, in stead of being the last one in my
line, the first...
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Chapter 11 - venite igitur descendamus
et confundamus ibi linguam eorum ut non audiat unusquisque vocem proximi
sui
»She was dry and sandy with working in the
graves of decieased languages.»
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16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32
Chapter 12 - benedicam benedicentibus
tibi et maledicam maledicentibus tibi atque in te benedicentur universae
cognationes terrae
I have heard of a bög ovan molnen
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Chapter 13 - homines autem Sodomitae
pessimi erant et peccatores coram Domino nimis
Odi profanum vulgus et arceo; Favete linguis; carmina
non prius Audita Musarum...
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Chapter 14 - et benedictus Deus Excelsus
quo pro- tegente hosten in manibus tuis sunt et dedit ei decimas ex omnibus
The old woman cried: »War is supposed to be
like this! Rape me!»
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16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24
Chapter 15 - edixitque eum foras et
ait illi suspice caelum et numera stellas si potes et dixit ei sic erit
semen tuum
If 90% of all films were pornofilms, it would still
be ten percentage points too little.
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16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21
Chapter 16 - dixitque ei angelus Domini
revertere ad dominam tuam et humiliare sub manibus ipsius
En ripost mot kärringsverige.
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Chapter 17 - et circumcidetis carnem
praeputii vestri ut sit in signum foederis inte me et vos
Mit det Dumheit kämpfen Götter selbst
vergebens.
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Chapter 18 - dixit itaque Dominus
clamor Sodomorum et Gomorrae multiplicatus est et peccatum earum adgravatum
est nimis
The Gordian knot's solution came before me like a sausage out of the
blue ass.
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Chapter 19 - respiciensque uxor eius post se versa est
in statuam salis
Life is a whore - and I am broke!
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Chapter 20 - nunc igitur redde uxorem viro suo quia propheta
est et orabit pro te et vives si autem nolueris reddere scito quod morte
morieris tu et omnia quae tua sunt
Humour is solely a lack of
womanliness.
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Chapter 21 - dixitque Sarra risum fecit mihi Deus quicumque
audierit conridebit mihi
Matalo, hombre, Matalo!
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Chapter 22 - extenditque manum et arripuit gladium ut
inmolaret filium
We must preserve the trees! At least many enough to hang
all the environment-Jesuses in.
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Chapter 23 - domine mi audi terram quam postulas quadringentis
argenti siclis valet istud est pretium inter me et te sed quantum est hoc
sepeli mortuum tuum
»If I know where Gothenburg is? Yeah, it's twenty years ahead
of Stockholm!»
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Chapter 24 - ego vero respondi domino meo quid si noluerit
venire mecum mulier
There are only two kind of women - whores and mothers.
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Chapter 25 - ille respondit en morior quid mihi proderunt
primogenita
It is better to köra ihjäl sig än att komma
fram too late.
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Chapter 26 - et multiplicabo semen tuum sicut stellas
cæli daboque posteris tuis universas regiones has et benedicentur
in semine tuo omnes gentes terræ
To my predecessors - if I had any
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Chapter 27 - dixitque Iacob ego sum Esau primogenitus
tuus feci sicut præcepisti mihi surge sede et comede de venatione
mea ut benedicat mihi anima tua
Kuken är bron till framtiden
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Chapter 28 - viditque in somnis scalam stantem super terram
et cacumen illius tangens cælum angelos quoque Dei ascendentes et
descendentes per eam
Only ugly women become feminists
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Chapter 29 - respondit Laban non est in loco nostro consuetudinis
ut minores ante tradamus ad nupitas
Love and other lies
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Chapter 30 - gyra omnes greges tuos et separa cunctas
oves varias et sparso vellere et quodcumque furvum et maculosum variumque
fuerit tam in ovibus quam in capris erit merces mea
Truth and other lies
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Chapter 31 - ait ne irascatur dominus meus quod coram
te adsurgere nequeo quia iuxta consuetudinem feminarum nunc accidit mihi
sic delusa sollicitudo quærentis est
En diatrib mot tiden
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Chapter 32 - at ille nequaquam inquit Iacob appellabitur
nomen tuum sed Israhel quoniam si contra Deum fortis fuisti quanto magis
contra homines praevalebis
War is the father of Everything
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Chapter 33 - currens itaque Esau obviam fratri suo amplexatus
est eum stringensque collum et osculans flevit
Snille och dålig smak
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Chapter 34 - quam cum vidisset
Sychem filius Emor Evei princeps terrae illius adamavit et rapuit et dormivit
cum illa vi opprimens virginem
The raggar-bible
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Chapter 35 - egrediente autem anima prae dolore et inminente
iam morte vocavit nomen filii sui Benomi id est filius doloris mei pater
vero apellavit eum Beniamin id est filius dexterae
»Almost as old as Rock'n'roll»
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Chapter 36 - divites enim erant valde et simul habitare
non poterant nec sustinebat eos terra peregrinationis eorum prae multitudine
gregum
Cultural garbage
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Chapter 37 - responderunt fratres eius numquid rex noster
eris aut subiciemur dicioni tuae haec ergo causa somniorum atque sermonum
invidiae et odii fomitem ministravit
The art of thinking
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Chapter 38 - ille sciens non sibi nasci filios introiens
ad uxorem fratris sui semen fundebat in terram ne liberi fratris nomine
nascerentur
Mentula magna minax
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Chapter 39 - post multos itaque dies iecit domina oculos
suos in Ioseph et ait dormi mecum
The public's favour conceals the expectation of your death
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Chapter 40 - post quos auferet Pharao caput tuum ac suspendet
te in cruce et lacerabunt volucres carnes utas
Ephemeral ontology
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Chapter 41 - tantaque fuit multitudo tritici ut harenae
maris coaequaretur et copia mensuram excederet
Anders Harningz empty barrels made the most noice
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56, 57
Chapter 42 - et fratrem vestrum minimumad me adducite
ut possim vestros probare sermones et non moriamini fecerunt ut dixerat
A Study in Superhuman Decay
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Chapter 43 - at ille respondit pax vobiscum nolite timere
Deus vester et Deus patris vestri dedit vobis thesauros in sacculis vestris
nam pecuniam quam dedistis mihi probatam ego habeo eduxitque ad eos Symeon
Six million jewes can't be wrong: Die!
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Chapter 44 - quibus ille ait cur sic agere voluistis an
ignoratis quod non sit similis mei in augurandi scientia
To murder just for the funeral feast
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Chapter 45 - et dixit fratribus suis ego sum Ioseph adhuc
pater meus vivit nec poterant respondere fratres nimio timore perterriti
Save us from people with »good intentions»
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Chapter 46 - quo cum pervenisset iuncto Ioseph curru suo
ascendit obviam patri ad eundem locum vidensque eum inruit super collum
eius et inter amplexus flevit
Orbis non sufficit
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Chapter 47 - dixit ergo Ioseph ad populos en ut cernitis
et vos et terram vestram Pharao possidet accipite semina et serite agros
Rövarna intar palatset
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Chapter 48 - qui rennuens ait scio fili mi scio et iste
quidem erit in populos et multiplicabitur sed frater eius iunior maior
illo erit et semen illius crescet in gentes
Innocence = Ignorance
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Chapter 49 - Beniamin lupus rapax mane comedet praedam
et vespere dividet spolia
Genial skit
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Chapter 50 - quo mortuo timentes fratres eius et mutuo
conloquentes ne forte memor sit iniuriæ quam passus est et reddat
nobis malum omne quod fecimus
To my posterity - if I'll have any
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